Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Toy Soldiers

Ron English

The desperate military recruiter is quickly joining the pedophile priest in the lexicon of modern stereotypes. And Chuck E. Cheese is there to lend a hand.
    Is the military targeting the birthday-party set?

    Last week, members of the Park Slope Parents Association were alerted to a new threat: Republicans bearing pizza. The mother of a 3-year-old reported that she was shocked to see “promo films for military recruitment” playing at her local Chuck E. Cheese’s. The 500 franchises of the amusement-park-like pizzeria were screening a two-minute montage of smiling soldiers handing out toys and candy to Iraqi kids (set to “America the Beautiful”). According to Chuck E. Cheese’s VP of marketing Dick Huston, this segment, created from footage donated by the Defense Department, began showing at the chain around July 4. “There was no firing of weapons,” notes Huston. “It was meant to honor our troops and the humanness of what is occurring. It is a nice, innocent piece. It’s pretty warm.” Still, customers complained that this was inappropriate for a child’s birthday party. “I guess people could interpret it as prowar, but we support what our troops are doing over there—helping kids.”

No word yet on how the campaign to recruit the littlest soldiers is going.


At 9/24/2005 9:28 AM, Blogger Recruiter said...

How is showing U.S. Troops handing candy to Iraqi children suddenly "Trying to recruit 3 year olds"? Why can't it be exactly what the VP said it was - their way of showing that they support the troops? IT'S THAT SIMPLE! There is not vast government conspiricy trying to enslave America's youth! Quit trying to make the Recruiters out there look like the bad guys - how about you make the Terrorists out there look like the bad guys they are?


At 9/26/2005 10:57 PM, Blogger velid said...

Hmm. Not just desperate, but hyper-sensitive and humorless as well. It should have been obvious to you if you read any of the other posts on this blog that I do not support the troops. Feel sorry for them yes, support them no. And obviously I do not support the attempts to drum up support for your imperial legions in the younger generation. Duh.


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